Last Blog!!!!!

So this is it!  The last blog......:(  Y'all have been a WONDERFUL class!  So much fun in such a small amount of time.  You guys are awesome!!!!  So for our last blog, I thought it would be fitting for everyone to share with each other your favorite memory (assignment, activity, person(s), lecture, etc) of this class.  Whether it was a topic that hit home, or a concept/theory that you related to, an activity that resonates in your mind, or something someone said or did in class, let us know.  Reflection is an important part of learning.

I'll start.  My favorite memory of this semester was when we were doing our Intercultural Communication exercise with the class broken down into 3 distinct cultures interacting with each other.  The "touchy feely huggers" were doing a group hug and Sam stood up to join in the hug when Allison quickly called him out and reminded him that he was not part of that culture and to sit back down.  Hilarious!!! A perfect example of acculturation and how our cultural values change when being exposed to others. 

I'm really gonna miss you guys. 

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do- Blog 11

Break ups are usually messy. Your book doesn't talk about all of the tug-of-wars that happen after dissolution. (Getting back together over and over, trying to be "friends", jealousy when you see them with someone new, etc.) During this time, it's difficult to know when the relationship is completely over and it's time to move on. Share with us your thoughts and experiences on this whole "after the dissolution" phase. How do you know when it's REALLY over? When do you stop trying to rekindle the fire? When do you know that you're ready to move on?

How Much Communication Is Too Much? Blog 9

Researchers looking at the impact of Facebook on relationships among college students found that the use of Facebook increased jealousy between friends and those in a relationship.  They identified four themes that contributed to increased jealousy.  They are as follows:

- Accessibility of information: Increased info about the interactions of significant others lead to increased monitoring and jealousy for 19.1% of participants

- Relationship jealousy: 16.2% of respondents were explicitly linked to Facebook use contributing to jealousy

- Facebook as an addiction: 10.3% of participants had major difficulty limiting the amount of time he or she looked at his or her partner’s Facebook profile.

- Lack of context: 7.4% of respondents referenced how Facebook can be ambiguous and that, without context, jealousy can be spurred over misunderstandings.

How do you think the use of technology has impacted interpersonal communication in the past 5-10 years?  Whether it be phones, texting, email, instant messaging, skype, social media, etc., has technology helped or hindered our interpersonal communication with others?  Please support your view with an example.   

Are 3 Heads Really Better Than One? Blog 8

The term Groupthink was coined by social psychologist Irving Janis (1972). It is when a group makes faulty decisions because group pressures lead to a deterioration of “mental efficiency, reality testing, and moral judgment”.  Groups affected by groupthink ignore alternatives and tend to take irrational actions that dehumanize other groups. A group is especially vulnerable to groupthink when its members are similar in background, when the group is insulated from outside opinions, and when there are no clear rules for decision making. It is like peer pressure on steriods.

Share another example of Groupthink in action that you know from history, personal experience or observation. Because we are social beings, we are all prone to Groupthink. What might we do to prevent becoming prey to the power of Groupthink?

Diversity In The Workplace- Blog 7

Studies show that 52% of people perfer to work with people like themselves. This begs the question, "What about diversity in the workplace?" Since most of us cannot choose who we will have to communicate with at work, how do we navigate through the complexities of a multicultural workplace? The top 4 diversity issues that cause problems are:

1. Language Differences
2. Differences in Values and Etiquette
3. Tone of voice
4. "Clustering" (hanging out with others from similar backgrounds)

Post an example of how a difference in one of these areas has caused a misunderstanding due to diversity. Offer some suggestions on how you think communication between people from diverse backgrounds can relate better to each other.

How to Keep Going- Blog 6

Studies have shown that couples that have been together for a long time display the following behaviors towards each other.  Which one do you think is the most important and why.  Give us a brief example.

1) PRO-SOCIAL BEHAVIORS-politeness, avoiding criticism, compromise, self-sacrifice

2) CEREMONIAL BEHAVIORS- remember and celebrate birthdays, anniversaries, etc.

3) COMMUNICATION BEHAVIORS- calling just to say “how are you”, open and honest discussions, resolving conflicts in a positive manner

4) TOGETHERNESS BEHAVIORS- being a couple, controlling extra-relational activities

The BFF- Blog 5

As we study the development of relationships, I'm sure you are reflecting on people who have been significant in your life. This week's blog looks at friendships.

What makes a good friend? Trust? Shared interests? Emotional support? Acceptance? Tell us about someone who you consider to be a BFF. What qualities do they possess? Briefly tell us about a pivotal event that moved your relationship from just friends to BFF.

Is Love Your Drug?

Love Addict Test

Take the self-quiz at the link above and see if you are a love addict.  Now that we know that love creates dopamine in the brain similar to many drugs like cocaine and meth, we can now understand how many can become addicted to being in love.

Why do you think some people fall in love and become love addicts while others fall in love but do not?  Do you think that it's a matter of biology? Life scripts? Attachment styles? Self-esteem? Etc.

The Pick-Up Artist :) Blog 4

Studies show that we have approximately 4 minutes in the contact stage to make a good impression.   And based on that first impression, many of us make up our minds on whether or not we want to pursue the relationship to the next level or just remain acquaintances. 

Share with us your favorite pick-up lines (funny, serious, cheesy, etc).  From your own experiences, do they work?  What do you think is the best "pick-up" strategy? (Leave a green dangly earring behind? Put your phone number in their phone?)  Let's see what you can come up with!

What's Your EQ?

After watching Dr. Daniel Goleman's video lecture on Emotional and Social Intelligence, we learned how important it is to be emotionally intelligent.  Take the self-test on emotional intelligence at the following link EQ self-test and then comment on which of the 4 major aspects of emotional intelligence you feel is the most important to living a successful life and why.

1.  Self-Awareness
2.  Self-Management
3.  Social Awareness
4.  Relationship Management

For more details on each of these aspects refer to the Emotional Intelligence handout on ACES under Files.

We're Just "Friends"

As we study the development of relationships and you put together your self-concept game, I'm sure you are reflecting on people who have been significant in your life. This week's blog looks at friendships.

Friendships can be complicated.  Blog your answers and experiences to these 3 questions.
1)  What's the difference between a bromance and homosexuality?
2)  Do you believe it's possible to be physically and emotionally attracted to someone and remain "just friends" without it ever escalating into something more?
3) Is it possible to end a love relationship with someone and then be good friends afterwards without it ever leading to something else or causing problems with new love partners?

EXCUUUUSE ME!

While most human beings will engage in making some excuses in their lives, the common Ben Franklin saying “He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else,” may be more of a self-fulfilling prophesy for excuse-makers than simply avoidance or laziness. Whether excuses are used to shift blame or improve what other people think, it may be easier for excuse-makers to live with excuses than think about living with having tried at something and failed.

Share with us a time when someone has given you an excuse that you know was a lie. How did you know that it wasn't the truth? What verbal/nonverbal cues were there? How did it affect your perception of  that person?

Be A Member!

Your first assignment is to become a member of this Commies of 1318 blog!!!!

As we explore what makes relationships tick, we need to hear from you!  We will be covering topics such as: listening, friendships, intimate relationships, workplace issues, family dynamics, love, and conflict strategies.  You will have several opportunities to reflect on your own relationships and communication style to find ways to improve all facets of your life.

As we embark on this journey together, I will post the latest studies and hot topics related to interpersonal communication on this blog. Your job is to respond with an example to either confirm or disagree with the posting by sharing insights from your own experiences, one you've found on a TV show, movie, or research.  

I look forward to blogging with you!

Dr. Karin Wilking

San Antonio College

Welcome to Interpersonal Communication!

As we explore what makes relationships tick, we will be covering topics such as: listening, friendships, intimate relationships, workplace issues, family dynamics, love, and conflict strategies. You will have several opportunities to reflect on your own relationships and communication style to find ways to improve all facets of your life. As part of this journey together, I will post the latest studies and hot topics related to interpersonal communication on this blog. Your job is to respond with an example to either confirm or disagree with the posting by sharing insights from your own experiences, or one you've found on a TV show, movie, or research. Feel free to comment on others' postings, and also post any interesting (articles, links, videos, books, tweets, jokes, etc.) related to communication and one-on-one relationships. I look forward to blogging with you!

Dr. Karin Wilking
San Antonio College