As we study the development of relationships, I'm sure you are reflecting on people who have been significant in your life. This week's blog looks at friendships.
What makes a good friend? Trust? Shared interests? Emotional support? Acceptance? Tell us about someone who you consider to be a BFF. What qualities do they possess? Briefly tell us about a pivotal event that moved your relationship from just friends to BFF.
I found this Joke online and thought of this class.
The Colonel's Order
A COLONEL ISSUED THE FOLLOWING DIRECTIVE TO HIS EXECUTIVE OFFICERS:
"Tomorrow evening at approximately 2000 hours Halley's Comet will be visible in this area; an event which occurs only every 75 years. Have the men fall out in the battalion area in fatigues, and I will explain this rare phenomenon to them. In case of rain, we will not be able to see anything, so assemble the men in the theater and I will show them films of it."
EXECUTIVE OFFICER TO COMPANY COMMANDER:
"By order of the Colonel, tomorrow at 2000 hours, Halley's Comet will appear above the battalion area. If it rains, fall the men out in fatigues, then march to the theater where this rare phenomenon will take place, something which occurs only once every 75 years."
COMPANY COMMANDER TO LIEUTENANT:
"By order of the Colonel be in fatigues at 2000 hours tomorrow evening. The phenomenal Halley's Comet will appear in the theater. In case of rain in the battalion area, the Colonel will give another order, something which occurs once every 75 years."
LIEUTENANT TO SERGEANT:
"Tomorrow at 2000 hours, the Colonel will appear in the theater with Halley's comet, something which happens every 75 years. If it rains, the Colonel will order the comet into the battalion area."
SERGEANT TO SQUAD:
"When it rains tomorrow at 2000 hours, the phenomenal 75-year-old General Halley, accompanied by the Colonel, will drive his comet through the battalion area theater in fatigues."
I will go in the other direction. Most recently I have stopped communicating with my best friend. He still lives like we grew up and felt as if he would eventually get me in trouble. So to eliminate threats to my livelihood, I chose to cut my loses. Interest and trust were non-existent for a long time, but I tried to stay friends, since he was the only childhood friend I had left. A good friend doesn't take advantage of you and is someone you can trust, they empower you and give you respect. Having nothing in common with someone shouldn't keep you from making good friends. Don't limit yourself.
I've had several good friends throughout my life.Can't really choose one because they've each have their own place. I believe in my opinion what makes a good friend is someone who'll listen to you about your problems, issues, etc. Someone who can render support or help when you need it. Someone who, even if you're wrong, will support your decision even when everyone is against you. Someone who will watch you grow up through your accomplishments and failures. However, the several good friends I do have have each showed their good friendship towards me and even that is more than enough to say, "He's a good friend". I definitely saw the bigger picture when I graduated from high school. The ones that always mattered stayed, and the ones that really didn't mattered flew.
Well let’s see with all my travels I’ve had many friends. I still stay in touch with some of them and the ones I still try and meet up with and talk to all the time are the ones that we really connect as friends. I think you have to be able to make connections on all kinds of levels, spiritual, emotional, ECT. If you don’t then I really don’t think you would be best friends, you would be just friends. I have to say this, out of all my friends, my honest most very best friend in the whole world, is my dad. Him and I do everything together and tell each other everything; he was even my best man at my wedding. Jeffery Ziegler
I have had many good friends through my life. I want to be friends with someone that I can trust if I need something done. I want to have a friend that I, you know, have a beer and laugh with sometimes. I want to have a friend that will not only listen to you, but offer some suggestions on how to solve a problem. I don't want to be friends with someone that will just use you. I would like to have a friend to have a beer with (a.k.a. my beer drinking buddy). Someone that I can have a good old time with.
Some qualities that some of my best friends have had throughout the years have been loyalty, honesty, trustworthiness, similar intrests in hobbies and whatnot, and dependibility. My best friends have been people that I can talk to about just about anything. Having an understanding of eachother's background and values and respecting those things are necessary. I also have to see them on a regular basis. Physical social contact is a must for me. If I only see you once or twice a week, you're a good aquantiance, but not even on a regular friend status. Inside jokes come with the territory, but being there when things get choppy is essential. Doing favors or giving little gifts because you want to and not because you're obligated to or only when someone asks. A bestfriend is essentially a person who is not in your immediate family that you treat like a member of family. I remember that I had one friend where we were so close that we felt comfortable giving eachother friendly kisses on the cheek. He was not my boyfriend and they were given in a totally platonic, non - sexual way. They were the kind that you would give your brother or sister.
Honestly, I cannot say I have ever had a “BFF”. A quality I would look for would be loyalty; something that is hard to come by these days. Loyalty in a friendship is vital because it provides a foundation for trust, builds common interests and provides a common respect which enables emotional support.
There are many qualities that you need in a good friend. One of the most important ones that I believe is trust. You should be able to trust a good friend with almost anything. You should be able to tell them something knowing that they aren't going to tell others about it. Shared interest is also a good thing but they don't have to be completely like you. Overall a good friend should be there for you when they need you and they should be pointing you in the right direction towards something positive.
I think that a good friend is someone loyal and trustworthy; you can talk to this person about anything and know that they won’t judge you. This doesn’t necessarily mean that they have to support every decision you make. It’s important to have friends who aren’t afraid to disagree with you and tell you that you’re wrong, as long as they do so because they are looking out for you. Of course, shared interests, emotional support and acceptance are important qualities in all friendships; however, one important factor that differentiates between friends and close friends, in my opinion, is this idea of looking out for one another. One example I can think of that illustrates this idea is when I was thinking of asking out a girl a few years ago; I decided to ask a few friends for advice. Most of my close friends told me that I should think about it carefully and some even told me bluntly that they didn’t trust her and that I shouldn’t do it. They weren’t saying those things to be mean, but because they had my best interest in mind.
The key characteristics for good friend are a nice combination of acceptance, shared interest, and trust. I think acceptance is probably the most important. If somebody doesn’t accept you and how you live it would be very difficult to have a meaningful relationship. Shared interest is not really that big of a deal, but two drastically different lifestyles can be a problem. Even in that situation though, two different people can still have something in common and become good friends and learn about each other. Also, trust is a basic need for any relationship, so it’s pretty much self-explanatory. Another trait that I think is important based on my experience is intelligence. When you and another person have similar intelligence you can both have an occasional serious conversation about life or things you consider important. I’ve had a hard time being friends with high school kids and immature older people. Its’ hard to explain, but when your friend has a low intelligence it is really difficult to relate to them.
I think trust is the biggest thing in friendship. You have to be able to trust that person with anything and trust them to do anything. My best friend has been there through everything. He's tried to be the most positive influence. He can make me laugh at any time and we get along great. He's a very giving person with a big heart. My biggest pivotol moment with my best friend Chris was when I was stuck out in the middle of nowhere with a bad engine. It was 2am and nobody would answer, not even my parents. I called Chris and he came to pick me up without asking any questions. Thats when I knew he was my best friend, because I could rely on him for anything, and now, 3 years down the road, I still can.
This is a hard one for me because I wouldn't really say I have a lot of BFFs. The one that immediately comes to mind is my friend Molleigh. We were always somewhat aquaintances but when I was going through a hard situation she was the one friend who was there for everything regardless of anything I did, how difficult it got, or how frustrating it was. For me I would say a BFF is someone who is reliable and dependable and who has a desire to be there for you. The best thing about Molleigh is she knows me so well and if I'm having a hard time she knows just the way to cheer me up and always makes time to do so.
My BFF is Katie. She's fiercely loyal, extremely generous, and one of the funniest people I've ever met. We are very similar, which is probably why we didn't really get along at first. But after realizing how much we both had in common, we immediately hit it off and over the years she has come to replace my previous best friend, Dani. I think honesty is very important to mine and Katie's friendship...but I really respect that she's able to be both honest and kind simultaneously (a trait Dani was lacking). I had no idea that I had been choosing to surround myself with vultures until me and Katie became close. It has really opened my eyes to the fact that you can trust people, and to me that is invaluable.
My bff is my roommate. The thing about my BFF and I is that we balance each other out. For example, life skills are my strength yet my roommate struggles with life skills. What I mean by life skills is like being able to solve life problems overcoming obstacles etc. my roommate on the other hand is very smart when It comes down to school and applying to different programs that give students money etc when I on the other hand have always struggled with school and don’t really know much about school stuff like applying for doctoral programs or programs that help Hispanic students etc. For example, I had no idea about anything when it came down to college. In fact I am still learning. Some of the things I didn’t know how to do where add and drop classes, apply for financial aid, communicate with professors, degree plans etc yet my roommate is only 22 and is already going to finish his master next summer has studied abroad in Rome, Italy when into his freshman year of college with 15 hrs already in the book and has already qualified for Peace Corps. On the other hand, I would always help my roommate with his life problems like issues he had with his father things that he struggles with in life like girlfriend issues or self esteem etc. So we always balance each other out we both recognize our strengths and our weaknesses and we try our very best to help each other so that we can both continue to grow and excel in life. We are also very positive towards each other but also push each other. For example my BFF is always on top of me when it comes down to school and if he catches me not going to classes he straight up tells me hey you need to get on the ball remember the importance of your education on the other hand when my bff doesn’t call his mother cause he states he’s too busy with school and work I remind him hey remember to appreciate your mother. So were both real with each other and never take something out of proportion or negatively. I think what took our friendship to another level was the past two years. Back home I was experiencing a lot of problems with school and here in SA he was experiencing a lot of problems outside of school. What was crazy though is that although we were 8 hrs away from each other and had so many other friends in the same city that we could go to we still managed to go to each other and all while we only communicated through phone.
I think the essential way to be a best friend is loyalty.
From the start we have to go through the stage of: similarity which including same interesting, that is the fundamental to make our talking start. Then, our character start to play its roles in the relationship. If people have conflict among their character, their relationship can not stay in a very long time. Therefore, this relationship goes to stable stage. Generally, if there is no fatal issue happen to it, it will step into a self-developing stage.
I have several BFF but they come from different social group, but all of those relationship has a definite similarity which is loyalty and I can not take the consequent which anyone betray or snitch our secret talking to other outsider.
This is your class blog for Interpersonal Communication. Every Thursday I will post something for you an article, video, picture or study related to interpersonal communication for you to read/view, ponder, and post your comments and thoughts. Feel free to also post additional links you find interesting for us to know about as well. Be interactive, respectful, and enlightened!
I found this Joke online and thought of this class.
ReplyDeleteThe Colonel's Order
A COLONEL ISSUED THE FOLLOWING DIRECTIVE TO HIS EXECUTIVE OFFICERS:
"Tomorrow evening at approximately 2000 hours Halley's Comet will be visible in this area; an event which occurs only every 75 years. Have the men fall out in the battalion area in fatigues, and I will explain this rare phenomenon to them. In case of rain, we will not be able to see anything, so assemble the men in the theater and I will show them films of it."
EXECUTIVE OFFICER TO COMPANY COMMANDER:
"By order of the Colonel, tomorrow at 2000 hours, Halley's Comet will appear above the battalion area. If it rains, fall the men out in fatigues, then march to the theater where this rare phenomenon will take place, something which occurs only once every 75 years."
COMPANY COMMANDER TO LIEUTENANT:
"By order of the Colonel be in fatigues at 2000 hours tomorrow evening. The phenomenal Halley's Comet will appear in the theater. In case of rain in the battalion area, the Colonel will give another order, something which occurs once every 75 years."
LIEUTENANT TO SERGEANT:
"Tomorrow at 2000 hours, the Colonel will appear in the theater with Halley's comet, something which happens every 75 years. If it rains, the Colonel will order the comet into the battalion area."
SERGEANT TO SQUAD:
"When it rains tomorrow at 2000 hours, the phenomenal 75-year-old General Halley, accompanied by the Colonel, will drive his comet through the battalion area theater in fatigues."
I will go in the other direction. Most recently I have stopped communicating with my best friend. He still lives like we grew up and felt as if he would eventually get me in trouble. So to eliminate threats to my livelihood, I chose to cut my loses. Interest and trust were non-existent for a long time, but I tried to stay friends, since he was the only childhood friend I had left. A good friend doesn't take advantage of you and is someone you can trust, they empower you and give you respect. Having nothing in common with someone shouldn't keep you from making good friends. Don't limit yourself.
ReplyDeleteI've had several good friends throughout my life.Can't really choose one because they've each have their own place. I believe in my opinion what makes a good friend is someone who'll listen to you about your problems, issues, etc. Someone who can render support or help when you need it. Someone who, even if you're wrong, will support your decision even when everyone is against you. Someone who will watch you grow up through your accomplishments and failures. However, the several good friends I do have have each showed their good friendship towards me and even that is more than enough to say, "He's a good friend". I definitely saw the bigger picture when I graduated from high school. The ones that always mattered stayed, and the ones that really didn't mattered flew.
ReplyDeleteWell let’s see with all my travels I’ve had many friends. I still stay in touch with some of them and the ones I still try and meet up with and talk to all the time are the ones that we really connect as friends. I think you have to be able to make connections on all kinds of levels, spiritual, emotional, ECT. If you don’t then I really don’t think you would be best friends, you would be just friends. I have to say this, out of all my friends, my honest most very best friend in the whole world, is my dad. Him and I do everything together and tell each other everything; he was even my best man at my wedding.
ReplyDeleteJeffery Ziegler
I have had many good friends through my life. I want to be friends with someone that I can trust if I need something done. I want to have a friend that I, you know, have a beer and laugh with sometimes. I want to have a friend that will not only listen to you, but offer some suggestions on how to solve a problem. I don't want to be friends with someone that will just use you. I would like to have a friend to have a beer with (a.k.a. my beer drinking buddy). Someone that I can have a good old time with.
ReplyDeleteSome qualities that some of my best friends have had throughout the years have been loyalty, honesty, trustworthiness, similar intrests in hobbies and whatnot, and dependibility. My best friends have been people that I can talk to about just about anything. Having an understanding of eachother's background and values and respecting those things are necessary. I also have to see them on a regular basis. Physical social contact is a must for me. If I only see you once or twice a week, you're a good aquantiance, but not even on a regular friend status. Inside jokes come with the territory, but being there when things get choppy is essential. Doing favors or giving little gifts because you want to and not because you're obligated to or only when someone asks. A bestfriend is essentially a person who is not in your immediate family that you treat like a member of family. I remember that I had one friend where we were so close that we felt comfortable giving eachother friendly kisses on the cheek. He was not my boyfriend and they were given in a totally platonic, non - sexual way. They were the kind that you would give your brother or sister.
ReplyDeleteThat last one on October 10, 2011 9:08 am was from Beatrice Ramos
ReplyDeleteHonestly, I cannot say I have ever had a “BFF”. A quality I would look for would be loyalty; something that is hard to come by these days. Loyalty in a friendship is vital because it provides a foundation for trust, builds common interests and provides a common respect which enables emotional support.
ReplyDeleteThere are many qualities that you need in a good friend. One of the most important ones that I believe is trust. You should be able to trust a good friend with almost anything. You should be able to tell them something knowing that they aren't going to tell others about it. Shared interest is also a good thing but they don't have to be completely like you. Overall a good friend should be there for you when they need you and they should be pointing you in the right direction towards something positive.
ReplyDeleteI think that a good friend is someone loyal and trustworthy; you can talk to this person about anything and know that they won’t judge you. This doesn’t necessarily mean that they have to support every decision you make. It’s important to have friends who aren’t afraid to disagree with you and tell you that you’re wrong, as long as they do so because they are looking out for you. Of course, shared interests, emotional support and acceptance are important qualities in all friendships; however, one important factor that differentiates between friends and close friends, in my opinion, is this idea of looking out for one another. One example I can think of that illustrates this idea is when I was thinking of asking out a girl a few years ago; I decided to ask a few friends for advice. Most of my close friends told me that I should think about it carefully and some even told me bluntly that they didn’t trust her and that I shouldn’t do it. They weren’t saying those things to be mean, but because they had my best interest in mind.
ReplyDeleteThe key characteristics for good friend are a nice combination of acceptance, shared interest, and trust. I think acceptance is probably the most important. If somebody doesn’t accept you and how you live it would be very difficult to have a meaningful relationship. Shared interest is not really that big of a deal, but two drastically different lifestyles can be a problem. Even in that situation though, two different people can still have something in common and become good friends and learn about each other. Also, trust is a basic need for any relationship, so it’s pretty much self-explanatory. Another trait that I think is important based on my experience is intelligence. When you and another person have similar intelligence you can both have an occasional serious conversation about life or things you consider important. I’ve had a hard time being friends with high school kids and immature older people. Its’ hard to explain, but when your friend has a low intelligence it is really difficult to relate to them.
ReplyDeleteI think trust is the biggest thing in friendship. You have to be able to trust that person with anything and trust them to do anything. My best friend has been there through everything. He's tried to be the most positive influence. He can make me laugh at any time and we get along great. He's a very giving person with a big heart. My biggest pivotol moment with my best friend Chris was when I was stuck out in the middle of nowhere with a bad engine. It was 2am and nobody would answer, not even my parents. I called Chris and he came to pick me up without asking any questions. Thats when I knew he was my best friend, because I could rely on him for anything, and now, 3 years down the road, I still can.
ReplyDeleteThis is a hard one for me because I wouldn't really say I have a lot of BFFs. The one that immediately comes to mind is my friend Molleigh. We were always somewhat aquaintances but when I was going through a hard situation she was the one friend who was there for everything regardless of anything I did, how difficult it got, or how frustrating it was. For me I would say a BFF is someone who is reliable and dependable and who has a desire to be there for you. The best thing about Molleigh is she knows me so well and if I'm having a hard time she knows just the way to cheer me up and always makes time to do so.
ReplyDeleteJaclyn
My BFF is Katie. She's fiercely loyal, extremely generous, and one of the funniest people I've ever met. We are very similar, which is probably why we didn't really get along at first. But after realizing how much we both had in common, we immediately hit it off and over the years she has come to replace my previous best friend, Dani. I think honesty is very important to mine and Katie's friendship...but I really respect that she's able to be both honest and kind simultaneously (a trait Dani was lacking). I had no idea that I had been choosing to surround myself with vultures until me and Katie became close. It has really opened my eyes to the fact that you can trust people, and to me that is invaluable.
ReplyDeleteMy bff is my roommate. The thing about my BFF and I is that we balance each other out. For example, life skills are my strength yet my roommate struggles with life skills. What I mean by life skills is like being able to solve life problems overcoming obstacles etc. my roommate on the other hand is very smart when It comes down to school and applying to different programs that give students money etc when I on the other hand have always struggled with school and don’t really know much about school stuff like applying for doctoral programs or programs that help Hispanic students etc. For example, I had no idea about anything when it came down to college. In fact I am still learning. Some of the things I didn’t know how to do where add and drop classes, apply for financial aid, communicate with professors, degree plans etc yet my roommate is only 22 and is already going to finish his master next summer has studied abroad in Rome, Italy when into his freshman year of college with 15 hrs already in the book and has already qualified for Peace Corps. On the other hand, I would always help my roommate with his life problems like issues he had with his father things that he struggles with in life like girlfriend issues or self esteem etc. So we always balance each other out we both recognize our strengths and our weaknesses and we try our very best to help each other so that we can both continue to grow and excel in life. We are also very positive towards each other but also push each other. For example my BFF is always on top of me when it comes down to school and if he catches me not going to classes he straight up tells me hey you need to get on the ball remember the importance of your education on the other hand when my bff doesn’t call his mother cause he states he’s too busy with school and work I remind him hey remember to appreciate your mother. So were both real with each other and never take something out of proportion or negatively. I think what took our friendship to another level was the past two years. Back home I was experiencing a lot of problems with school and here in SA he was experiencing a lot of problems outside of school. What was crazy though is that although we were 8 hrs away from each other and had so many other friends in the same city that we could go to we still managed to go to each other and all while we only communicated through phone.
ReplyDeleteI think the essential way to be a best friend is loyalty.
ReplyDeleteFrom the start we have to go through the stage of: similarity which including same interesting, that is the fundamental to make our talking start. Then, our character start to play its roles in the relationship. If people have conflict among their character, their relationship can not stay in a very long time. Therefore, this relationship goes to stable stage. Generally, if there is no fatal issue happen to it, it will step into a self-developing stage.
I have several BFF but they come from different social group, but all of those relationship has a definite similarity which is loyalty and I can not take the consequent which anyone betray or snitch our secret talking to other outsider.